Living With Intention
Hey Yall!!
It’s been a while but I have literally been out in the world trying to make a difference in not just my life but in the lives of all of those around me as well. It’s days like today that remind me of why I started blogging in the first place. At that time I just wanted to put words to paper. I wanted to release. So, here I am. Honestly, being a public speaker now is simply an extension of my blogging. I’m sharing all of the same information just on a different platform. I just want to share everything I know and have experienced in a way that makes your journey a little less bumpy than the journey I have taken.
I had a friend tell me yesterday she was focusing on taking “Ownership in October” and extending it to her clients and online followers as well. Listen, to be honest with you, I had to ask myself what exactly do I need to take ownership of. I literally asked like everything was perfect (insert side eye) but realistic Lashonda was like “girl stop.” So, today I am choosing to take ownership of my life by living with intention and not being emotionally available for those individuals close to me who are not emotionally available to me. Those people who never ask how I am but I am constantly asking how they are. Those people who emotionally drain me physically and mentally and provide nothing in return. This may sound selfish but WE have to get comfortable with choosing ourselves when it comes to protecting our own mental health. Here is an example, I was talking to a friend the other day (we will call her Chloe) and after talking to her Emanuel said, you always laugh so much when you are talking to Chloe. You don’t laugh that much when you talk on the phone to other people. I know exactly when you are talking to Chloe. First of all this registered with me and stuck with me all that day. I even sent Chloe a text just saying thank you and I love you. Guys, that friend truly fills my cup and I would love to think I do the same for her. We don’t talk everyday but when we do it is a good time, lots of laughs, and we share with EACH OTHER. We have cried together but we have also shared many many laughs together as well.
In processing this I realized there are so many ways to interpret taking ownership. There is taking ownership of your life, taking ownership of your mess, taking ownership of your mistakes, taking ownership of all of the things you do right, basically just being 100% accountable for YOU. As I continued to process and started to type out this blog it became very clear to me that part of being the best version of yourself entails taking ownership of your life in every single way possible.
Let’s start with the hardest two ways of taking ownership…taking ownership of our mistakes and taking ownership of our mess. Be honest with yourself WE are not perfect! We may strive to be but the truth is We. Will. Never. Be. Perfect. This may be a hard pill to swallow but it’s the truth. Don’t get me wrong there are some things we can do perfectly but that doesn’t mean every time we do it things will turn out the same way. My question to you is have you accepted the fact that there are times in your life where you have done things you are not proud of and said things you are not proud of? My second question is have you forgiven yourself? If you have accepted all of these things about yourself and love yourself regardless then no one can use that against you. This is taking ownership. Taking ownership of what you’ve done but also choosing to take ownership of your life and not living it in a way where people can use your mistakes against you. Choosing to not allow people to use your past hurts and your past decisions against you involves you forgiving yourself and striving each day moving forward to not make those same mistakes again.
I know you have been an addict. I know you have been mean and nasty. I know you have been a cheater. I know you have hurt people. I know you have been a thief. I know you have spoken ill will about people. I know you have used racial slurs. I know you have been a liar. I KNOW YOU HAVE! But who are you TODAY! Are you taking ownership of alllll your mess and then accepting that you are not that person anymore or accepting that this is the person you don’t want to be anymore? If you need to seek help with coming to terms with these things and changing the direction of your life then do that. But the key IS dealing with it head on and not beating yourself up any longer about it. Self-love, self-forgiveness, and ownership.
You can’t change the past but the decisions you make right now, today, in this very moment can change the projection of your entire future. If you need to talk to a mental health professional then do that. That’s a step in the right direction but never forget to take the time to acknowledge all of those things you do well and have done well. Just reading this post is a step in the right direction and something you’ve done well today. Don’t be afraid to take ownership of your own wellbeing and all that entails. You cant depend on people to do it for you or look to people to fill those holes that only you can fill.
I hope I inspired you today to look at your life, fill some holes, and take ownership of the here and now as well as your future. You will be better for it. You are destined for greatness. You are not your past mistakes. Your future is bright.
It’s been a while but I have literally been out in the world trying to make a difference in not just my life but in the lives of all of those around me as well. It’s days like today that remind me of why I started blogging in the first place. At that time I just wanted to put words to paper. I wanted to release. So, here I am. Honestly, being a public speaker now is simply an extension of my blogging. I’m sharing all of the same information just on a different platform. I just want to share everything I know and have experienced in a way that makes your journey a little less bumpy than the journey I have taken.
I had a friend tell me yesterday she was focusing on taking “Ownership in October” and extending it to her clients and online followers as well. Listen, to be honest with you, I had to ask myself what exactly do I need to take ownership of. I literally asked like everything was perfect (insert side eye) but realistic Lashonda was like “girl stop.” So, today I am choosing to take ownership of my life by living with intention and not being emotionally available for those individuals close to me who are not emotionally available to me. Those people who never ask how I am but I am constantly asking how they are. Those people who emotionally drain me physically and mentally and provide nothing in return. This may sound selfish but WE have to get comfortable with choosing ourselves when it comes to protecting our own mental health. Here is an example, I was talking to a friend the other day (we will call her Chloe) and after talking to her Emanuel said, you always laugh so much when you are talking to Chloe. You don’t laugh that much when you talk on the phone to other people. I know exactly when you are talking to Chloe. First of all this registered with me and stuck with me all that day. I even sent Chloe a text just saying thank you and I love you. Guys, that friend truly fills my cup and I would love to think I do the same for her. We don’t talk everyday but when we do it is a good time, lots of laughs, and we share with EACH OTHER. We have cried together but we have also shared many many laughs together as well.
In processing this I realized there are so many ways to interpret taking ownership. There is taking ownership of your life, taking ownership of your mess, taking ownership of your mistakes, taking ownership of all of the things you do right, basically just being 100% accountable for YOU. As I continued to process and started to type out this blog it became very clear to me that part of being the best version of yourself entails taking ownership of your life in every single way possible.
Let’s start with the hardest two ways of taking ownership…taking ownership of our mistakes and taking ownership of our mess. Be honest with yourself WE are not perfect! We may strive to be but the truth is We. Will. Never. Be. Perfect. This may be a hard pill to swallow but it’s the truth. Don’t get me wrong there are some things we can do perfectly but that doesn’t mean every time we do it things will turn out the same way. My question to you is have you accepted the fact that there are times in your life where you have done things you are not proud of and said things you are not proud of? My second question is have you forgiven yourself? If you have accepted all of these things about yourself and love yourself regardless then no one can use that against you. This is taking ownership. Taking ownership of what you’ve done but also choosing to take ownership of your life and not living it in a way where people can use your mistakes against you. Choosing to not allow people to use your past hurts and your past decisions against you involves you forgiving yourself and striving each day moving forward to not make those same mistakes again.
I know you have been an addict. I know you have been mean and nasty. I know you have been a cheater. I know you have hurt people. I know you have been a thief. I know you have spoken ill will about people. I know you have used racial slurs. I know you have been a liar. I KNOW YOU HAVE! But who are you TODAY! Are you taking ownership of alllll your mess and then accepting that you are not that person anymore or accepting that this is the person you don’t want to be anymore? If you need to seek help with coming to terms with these things and changing the direction of your life then do that. But the key IS dealing with it head on and not beating yourself up any longer about it. Self-love, self-forgiveness, and ownership.
You can’t change the past but the decisions you make right now, today, in this very moment can change the projection of your entire future. If you need to talk to a mental health professional then do that. That’s a step in the right direction but never forget to take the time to acknowledge all of those things you do well and have done well. Just reading this post is a step in the right direction and something you’ve done well today. Don’t be afraid to take ownership of your own wellbeing and all that entails. You cant depend on people to do it for you or look to people to fill those holes that only you can fill.
I hope I inspired you today to look at your life, fill some holes, and take ownership of the here and now as well as your future. You will be better for it. You are destined for greatness. You are not your past mistakes. Your future is bright.
Live everyday with intention and strive to always be the best version of yourself. Can you do it?
XOXO
XOXO
Lashonda
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